bonding lessons #2 (aka for when you've been rubbed up the wrong way)

In my previous (and first) instalment about the lessons I am learning through our bunny bonding process, I talked about how Olaf was reacting out of fear when he and Bobo met, how he would instantly go into attack mode to protect himself. However, in a situation that was stressful and overwhelming for both bunnies, Bobo was able to remain relatively calm.

Firstly, I’m delighted to share that since those initial meetings, Olaf has calmed down and begun to realise that Bobo, though much bigger than him, isn’t a threat, but a bit of a softie.

So, things have calmed down. However, the majority of the credit for that lies firmly at Bobo’s feet and how he reacted each time Olaf flinched.

Although Olaf’s knee-jerk to attack and protect himself had calmed and settled, when Bobo moved too fast in their bonding pen, Olaf was very quick to panic and lunge, getting ready to, again, defend himself.

However, Bobo reacted instantly each time and managed to diffuse the situation each time.


Well, every time Bobo realised that he’d moved too fast or too soon or too anything, and Olaf was reacting by lunging, Bobo would instantly drop his tummy and whole body flat on the floor. I guess, if you think of the situation in human terms, you’d be in a room with someone who’s highly strung. And every time you stand up, they spin round and are ready to defend themselves by attacking you, if necessary. If you stay standing, they’ll panic and a fight could ensue. However, if you sit back down quickly again, you don’t look so threatening and the situation can quickly calm down.

This is exactly what Bobo was doing. Instantly, in the blink of an eye, he read the situation and made himself look less threatening to Olaf.

And each time Bobo did this, Olaf calmed down also.

It was really interesting to watch. And it got me thinking.

By moving too fast, too soon, too unexpectedly, by looking too big and threatening, Olaf was triggered by Bobo and he instantly reacted.

In a way, you could say that Bobo was rubbing Olaf up the wrong way by moving around the pen because Olaf was still a little uptight and unsure about their friendship. So, when Bobo moved, Olaf’s buttons were pressed and boom! he’d lunge.

The exact same thing happens to us.

I can imagine you can already think of someone in our life who presses our buttons, intentionally or unintentionally.

That person may be someone who’s passing through our life. They could be a complete stranger who says something that goes against your principles and, unintentionally, presses your buttons. It could be a friend who’s constantly being insensitive… a friend who doesn’t remain a friend for long because they’re always rubbing you up the wrong way.

Or it could be someone who’s been in your life for a long time, maybe forever; someone you haven’t chosen to cut cords with, perhaps because you don’t want to – their triggering comments are much as frequent than their supportive ones. Or perhaps because they’re an immediate family member and it’s not so easy cutting cords with family.

Whoever it may be, I think we can all think of someone in our life who rubs us up the wrong way, intentionally or unintentionally, often or every now and then.

When they push your buttons, how do you react?

Are you like Olaf and you have a knee-jerk reaction to defend yourself?

More often than not, we react negatively to someone who rubs us up the wrong way. When they trigger us, we may not jump right in to physical defend ourselves. However, we might verbally defend ourselves, something that can lead to an argument. Or we might say nothing, but huff and go quiet on them for some time. Or we might go over and over and over in our heads what we should have and could have said in that moment which have put them in the rightful place.

It really doesn’t matter how you react negatively. The important thing to grasp here is that you have reacted negatively and that reaction isn’t benefitting you in any way. Rather it only ends up hurting you on some level: emotionally, mentally, spiritually.

So how should you react when someone triggers you and rubs you up the wrong way? Indeed is it possible to change how you react because your reaction to such situations is an immediate knee-jerk reaction?

Well, I chose to turn to the energies that are full of unconditional love and completely non-judgmental for advice and guidance on this. Yes, you’ve guessed it – I asked the angels to guide me intuitively through my cards.

If you would like support and guidance on dealing with people who rub you up the wrong way, see what the angels have to share with us by clicking the button below.

Viv xx